Problem solved

On November 12, I wondered what the third line of Elgar's "As Torrents in Summer". Well, as if to answer my prayer, Mr. R has decided to have us sing that song again this year. We sang it today. The third line, the one I couldn't remember is "Half-dried  in their channels".

I love that song. So much. It is among the most sunny hopeful songs I know.

What just happened (I'm sitting in History)

Ms. M: James, you have a big smile on your face.

James: Is there something wrong with that?

Ms. M: No, I was just wondering

James: It's afternoon in America, you know?

And just now:

Ms. M: They began sexual division of labor. Oh wait, I should rephrase that.

We laughed.

Also, Mr. R brought up "suddenly rice" again. I cracked up, just like I did six months ago... the last time he made a sudden-rice joke.

Love always,
Clara

Secret of the day

Homework? What homework?

I did none tonight. Not that I wasn't assigned any, I just didn't do it.

Love always,
Clara

Real Conversations in Chem

Mr. H: What can excite electrons?

Person1: Heat

Person2: Light

Person3: Electricity

Grier: Jill's hot looks.

Love always,
Clara

All in the family

I spent an unusual amount of time hanging out with the sister today. I had one requirement, or I would threaten to go upstairs and (shock and horror) do my homework. She had to sit. She likes to pace, but it makes me nervous and it's hard to hear her and I can't tell if she's paying attention. So I made her sit.

She did.

Then I explained some chemistry to her and we talked about how to build a bomb.

Hypothetically. And I feel like that's a dangerous thing to say on the internet.

Disclaimer: I did not intend to actually build said bomb. We were just discussing what would happen if you turned on all of the gas faucets in the science wing and lit a match... which only sounds more suspicious... point is, we aren't actually going to do it. I promise.

Mom made a blog today. Or rather, I made it for her, but it was her stylistic input, so she gets a little credit.

I was at school for all the daylight hours today. Drove over in the blue hour, drove home at dusk. It's a strange feeling, knowing you might be wasting your life reading The Scarlet Letter and reviewing trigonometric identities, hidden from that daylight.

But I must admit, driving to school before the sun rises is an amazing feeling. I don't know why, but it is definitely the highlight of my tuesday.

I was looking at colleges' websites the other day, and one mentioned getting up early to walk to class in the snow, and how sometimes that sucks. But I kind of think it would be cool. I got an image of myself stepping out of the dorm and seeing snow on the ground, the sun coming up, and grabbing a bit and eating it, because I'm a five year old, and then giggling.

Just because that's how I see myself. And I doubt I'll grow up that much before college.

I may be destined to be something of a five year old forever. I don't mind.

Love always,
Clara

Julia Allison says interesting things that inspire me

Quote from http://julia.nonsociety.com

"The Starbucks lady at the airport had [her nails] done with little green mistletoe painted on them. That was pretty awesome, and I told her so"

People should do that kind of thing more often. I try to.

Just a thought.

Make the world brighter.

Love always,
Clara

The Playlist.

It's been a while since I've done this...

The music of the month:

Before the Worst - The Script

The Man Who Can't Be Moved - The Script

Falling Faster - The Love Willows

Move Along - The All American Rejects

Human - The Killers

Another Way to Die - Jack White and Alicia Keys

Lost+ - Coldplay feat. Jay-Z

White Horse - Taylor Swift

Breakeven - The Script

Manic - Plumb

The Show - Lenka

Don't Let Me Fall - Lenka

Love always,
Clara

hahaHAHAHAhaha

"Gossip Girl is brought to you in part by Gardasil"

a.k.a. the STD vaccine.

Stunningly appropriate? I think so.

And for the record, I'm not hating on Gardasil. I'm protected from HPV too :)

Love always,
Clara

Secret of the day

I used to have an irrational fear of glue guns. Not that I would burn myself, as I was quite confident in my handling skills, but that I would leave one plugged in and burn the house down, killing my family and destroying everything that was dear to us.

Love always,
Clara

December...

Expect my posts to be longer, more interesting and thought out, and overall better.

I'm in writing withdrawal, so all of the interestingness that used to go into my novel is now... here.

I'm done with my homework and have already taken a shower (plus, tonight I decided to do the whole exfoliate-shave-tanning moisturizer thing even though it's winter. so this shower process was time-consuming) ALREADY. Usually my first thought would be "Okay cool, time to go work on the novel", but there is no novel to be written. 

I plan to edit it, of course, but that is happening in January. I need to distance myself for a little bit. To gain perspective, you know.

Today I found myself pretending to play hackey-sack (how do you spell that?) with a random bunch of guys in my grade and freshmen. I hadn't intended to. I had intended to find Kayla and whoever she was hanging out with in the East Building. But I found hackey-sack instead of kayla, and was given an opening in their large circle. Which was cool until the guys in my grade started being INCREDIBLY MEAN to me.

Okay, not really. They're sexist jerks, whatever, I thought it was funny. But of course, to protect my dignity, I acted shocked and appalled.

Then Kayla and Nikki showed up, so I had an exit.

I have this weird feeling that every day I wake up with the same delusion, and by the end of the day I'm proven wrong. Time and time again, I'm disappointed by reality.

I wonder if Five Guys has veggie burgers. Probably not.

Why am I thinking about that?

I suppose it's because I was thinking just now about my vegetarianism and how I can't imagine eating meat again, except the occasional bite of turkey at thanksgiving, which I intend to make a tradition. And I'm coming to terms with the fact that I can probably never again eat mashed potatoes.

(If you factor in all of the past and present code names in that last sentence, oh it means so much more)

But literally it's true. And so I was contemplating other circumstances under which I might be tempted to eat meat... the only thing I could think of was Five Guys. I've resisted so far though.

This post will probably prove the uninterestingness of my novel, to convince all of you who think it is a thing worth reading that you are horribly wrong.

Love always,
Clara

I have this idea

I don't know what it would be used for.

But what if you took a camera and approached random people on the street and said:

"Tell me a lie"

What would they say?

What would it reveal?

Could it be super interesting?

This is what I have been contemplating.

Love always,
Clara

BIG HUGE SECRET

I'm a little nervous about putting this next secret on the internet.

But I have vowed to be 100% honest with you, dear random internet reader or close friend of mine, either or.

Secret of the day:

I don't actually have a headache. I made that up.

Love always,
Clara

Family parties

Two parties tonight. With the lovely parents.

At the first, I knew no one. It was a scene out of gossip girl, with the exceedingly attractive and sophisticated high school kids from the all-boys' and all-girls' schools being corrupt, and of course there's the mysterious girl who's "a family friend". I'd like to think I was mysterious. It's possible I was just awkward.

At the second, I had heard everyone's name in stories of my mom's adolescence. So that was cool, putting the pieces together. My step-uncle steve is a creeper. It was funny, all of it.

Secret of the day:

I actually haven't started my homework at all. I've been conveniently forgetting about it all break. Tomorrow is the last day of national novel writing month. I'm kind of half-screwed.

Love always,
Clara

Friday

I'm so tired.

We went shopping this morning. Mom, aunt Gail, and I. It was epic.

Secret of the day:

My second (third?) cousins are kind of weirder than I had imagined they would be.

Love always,
Clara

black friday

I woke up at 5 :45 this morning.

Went shopping.

I think it was worth it.

Love always,
Clara

thanksgiving secret

I see way more of my dad in myself than of my mom, but I see a lot of my mom's sister Gail in there too... I'd rather be like my dad.

Love always,
Clara

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

It's turkey day and I'm reading twilight for maybe the third time and feeling quite depressed about my love life. I've said it before and I'll say it again- my edward cullen better show up pretty soon, or I'll wander off with Mike Newman, and everyone will be sorry.

Not that there's even a Mike in the sad sad life that belongs to me.

Okay, enough self-pity for the one day of the year supposed to be entirely devoted to thankfulness. I am thankful that...

-I have warm boots on right now

-My cousins are cool

-I have little homework over break

-My nails look really funky right now

-My dog is the cutest thing alive, and if you disagree you're wrong

-I have a generally good life, compared to some others out there

-I don't have to take the SATs again

et.

cetera.

They always say though to focus less on yourself on thanksgiving... that seems a little counterintuitive to me, just because if I'm being thankful on the behalf of others, it would end up sounding like:

-I'm thankful that Paris Hilton's hair is so nice

-I'm thankful that Kanye West is still successful

And so on.

I figure people probably mean "Be thankful and realize that other people can't ramble on as long as you can about how great their lives are"

Which is a good sentiment.

I don't know. I'm usually in it for the turkey and mashed potatoes.

Until this year.

Two things I'm NOT thankful for

-My dysfunctional inflammation-affected body that can't really handle simple carbohydrates or fats

-My sudden distaste for rotting animal flesh (otherwise known as the fact that I'm a vegetarian)

Love always,
Clara

Secret of the day

I was kind of mean to Linda today, and implied that my uterus was going to explode.

Love always,
Clara

Real Conversation about Wet Sinks

With two friends of mine, one of whom was very confused as to what we were talking about. Hereby referred to as D and W to protect their privacy... they wouldn't want this conversation on the internet, I don't think.

D: Don't you hate it when in the bathroom the counters are really wet?

Me: Oh my god I do! 

D and Me: *chat about this*

W: (just joining the conversation) And you have to wonder what the liquid is in the first place...

Me and D: Um... Yeah...

W: You know what it is? Butt sweat. 

Me: *laughs for a million years at that image but simultaneously wants to throw up*

D: *does likewise*

Me: I don't know what experiences you've had with this, but D and I were talking about like, on the sink counter, when people are really messy washing their hands.

W: ..... oh. that's not what i thought you were talking about.

That might be the crudest blog post I have ever written.

Love always,
Clara

Today I'm going to write about 7th grade

Caroline Furnace, to be specific. Which is the trip we go on during the first month or so of school to get together, look at animals, learn how to read a map, eat bad food, and bond.

During all of this, you have to keep a journal-type thing. 

I just found mine.

Can I just say that my personality has not changed since seventh grade? Maybe the way I show it has, but not my real personality. example- when we were asked to write "I helped my group by..." and "I could have..." for this stupid/fun team building thing, I wrote

"I helped my group by getting people to listen to the other people.

I could have taken it a bit more seriously"

Still frustrated with people who don't listen. Still not taking it seriously.

Then we did this thing where you had to sit in the dark with one other person, and then write about it. I wrote a very dark poem about being the perfect target for like, a rape/murder, but also about how silly that thought was.

Skip to the back of the notebook, which was essentially our entertainment on the three hour bus rides to and from this place. Mash games, Orange games, doodles, quotes, etc. Apparently I've been compulsively writing quotes down for a long time. Notable quotes in the back:

"Cibus est crappy (besides cake!)"-- I had been taking latin for about a month. Cibus erat pessimus.

"I'm bisexual! He can get an implant!"-- Someone actually said this in a game of Mash when he was paired up with a guy. 

"Happy Chickens"-- I don't remember how this relates to Caroline Furnace, but I remember that this one time I was driving down the highway with my parents and saw this truck of chickens being transported. And they were NOT happy chickens. And I was really pretty upset by that. It made me want to be a vegetarian.

Of course, now I am.

I'm getting all these caroline-furnace related memories. Like, before we went, I wrote a newspaper article on it (I was one of four people on the newspaper staff that year. I loved it). And I asked a number of people what they thought it would be like (what we would do, what the food would be like, etc etc etc). Well, I asked my old sixth grade teacher, Mr Bloom, who I am still 100% in love with (and I mean that) about the food and he said:

"A little charcoaly. And it probably tastes like Caroline"

And I laughed for like, twenty minutes straight.

I read that notebook and saw so much of myself in it. It's funny how I would have been good friends with my seventh grade self, once I got her to stop frontin' (for lack of a better word) and just chill out.

Love always,
Clara

Vampires and love

I just saw Twilight with my sister. We loved it. Sure, if I were being rational and really analyzing the movie I would say that some parts were a little unclear and there wasn't nearly enough Alice for my liking, but I am being a teenage girl, so my only coherent thought is: Where the hell is my Edward Cullen?

My sister and I were debating whether he needs to be a vampire or not (I said "ooh i want one" and she said "a vampire? you want a vampire?" and i said "no, i just want... that" and off we were).

She says that if he were human there would be no plot.

I agreed, but said that the real story was in his devotion to her, and her completely retarded (in a beautiful way) trust in him. That was the part I wanted. Although there wouldn't be a plot.

I then argued that one needn't have a good storyline for a good life. And for example, we know this family whose life could be a lifetime movie, complete with plot twists and red herrings, but I would NOT want to be them.

My puppy has decided he wants to play with me. There's this yellow plastic key that he keeps trying to get me to throw for him.

He is the cutest thing in the world. I do not exaggerate when I say this.

Love always,
Clara