Hannah: John, I could see you emoting from across the room!
John is very expressive.
John: I never really cursed in high school, because all of my friends in high school were people I'd gone to elementary school with, and I'd been a goody-goody in elementary school, so if I cursed people would be like, "Oh, the John White from elementary school wouldn't say that!" and they'd make a big deal. So I avoided it.
Me: I don't think any of us from elementary school would curse.
Hannah: AWW YEAH. I LEARNED TO MULTIPLY SHIT. AND WRITE SOME FUCKING CURSIVE, BITCHES!
This had me in hysterics for probably about five minutes.
Later, John was having some kind of existential crisis with his brownie.
John: I'm going to use my hands. Be a man! Use your hands!
Me: Yeah, fuck utensils.
John: Don't you know that rhyme that everyone did in elementary school?
Me: What?
John: When you're sitting on the john / And the toilet paper's gone / Be a man! [clap clap] Use your hands!
Me: Oh my god. That's disgusting. Ew. What?
John: You've never heard that?
Me: No!
John: Maybe it was a Florida thing. I never said it. Other kids did.
Me: What's manly about having fecal matter on your hands?
Sorry if any of yall are reading this blog post while eating. To be fair though, I was eating dinner during this conversation. So really I'm just giving you the full experience of my side of this conversation.
Clara
1 comment:
we're, like, soo funny, guys
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