The First Video in der Schweiz

All about the IB retreat.

Yay nature!

Song- Strictly Game by Harlem Shakes

EDITED TO ADD: I hereby blame my awesome music taste on John Bennett. Thank you John.

Love always,
Clara

Thoughts on napping.

I had a three hour nap this afternoon. That tells me two things-

1. I may be coming down with something

2. I will not be able to fall asleep tonight

Both of those things are really annoying, to be honest. I hadn't meant to take a nap. I've come to hate them, actually. It's like being kidnapped.

Most people say they feel better after taking a nap. I usually feel pretty crappy when I wake up. I walk around like a zombie, confused by my surroundings, for about twenty minutes, and then I HAVE to eat something, even though I'm never hungry, and then I feel ill.

Also naps give me really weird dreams. For instance, I had a dream today about the Apple tablet. In the dream I woke up and found one on my bed, and realized I'd have to keep it a secret, because Steve Jobs would be upset if he realized MacBooks like Patrick were transforming into tablets.

Love always,
Clara

What a great place

Things I have done since being in Switzerland

1. Hung out in sketchy parks
2. Been carded (but legal) which is cool
3. Bought shoes
4. Gone on seven trains in twenty four hours
5. Swum in Lake Lugano
6. Seen Italy
7. Hung out in the french alps
8. Put my toes in glacier water (which is really f-ing cold)
9. Been incompetent in three different languages
10. Navigated my mother to the outlet mall with my limited German and her vague sense of Italian
11. Learned to be okay with not knowing where I am
12. Picked up a lot of sticks and put them into giant piles
13. Gotten better at the harmonica

So, as they say in high German, "alles ist gute"

Or maybe that's not how they say it. I'm not sure whether "alles" is singular or plural or masculine or feminine or what, or how predicate adjectives work, or really anything (see #9).

Love always,
Clara

Trips.

I have found that at school trips, regardless of how bad the food can be, people bond.

I'm a fan of that phenomenon.

Things I am not a fan of:

• Allergies
• Long long train rides
• Not speaking a language other than English
• People who take things from your duffel
• Pulling rocks out of the ground for "community service" when clearly it has nothing to do with the actual community and everything to do with manual labor.

I don't get why teachers and the like always equate community service with manual labor. There are plenty of better ways to actually serve a community, without literally getting your hands dirty. Like the PODER tutoring. That was just fun, and it made you feel happy about it later, and it wasn't bad for my sinuses.

I have a lot of personal objections to the CAS IB program (Creativity, Action, Service), which I will address at another time when I really have my facts straight. It seems I have another educational/bureaucratic nemesis. The College Board/ETS isn't the only one to be receiving letters...

Love always,
Clara

In the student lounge

Percy: she needs someone to boost her confidence
Jalena: Percy, go to sleep.

We leave for the camping thing in like three hours. But in the meantime I have nothing to do.



Love always,
Clara

Back to that mall

I took my parents back to that super-sweet mall. It makes me so happy.

We had to do some grocery shopping anyways, so it was a worthwhile trip.

I spend all of my time sitting in the student lounge having conversations or doing math. Or sometimes both. Depending.

The math stuff is pretty sweet so far. I've emailed my real-live-teacher and he sounds nice. I told him how sometimes I recite Fibonacci numbers in my head while I'm running (to distract myself from the fact that I'm running). He apparently does something similar while juggling. He signed his email, "Have a great day and welcome to Calculus."

So I'm thinking I get on well with math-types.

Tomorrow we leave for our IB-retreat to god-knows-where. Hopefully it's fun, in a Caroline-Furnace/Freshman-Trip/Junior-Retreat kind of way. I'll get to know people better regardless.

That's a bit of a note- I'll be non-bloggable for the next couple days. Apologies in advance. I'll tell you all about it when I get back.

Love always,
Clara

I went to school today.

In the most technical sense. I had one class.

I spent my other time trying to get my online Calculus course past the school's firewall, learning everyone's name, getting lunch at the supermarket and eating it on the loading dock feeling simultaneously sketchy and urban, and doing my German homework.

That's right. Two hundred words about my summer.

At least it's not a three page essay... like APUSH last year.

You kids at home haven't started school yet. I am jealous.

But after school we had fun. I went out with my fellow seniors and they showed me Westside, which is basically a very American shopping mall west of Berne. I like, heard angels sing when I went in, and I'm not a huge shopping mall person.

On a related note, I've started saying "y'all"

I think I identify more with the traditionally American things (such as being southern and liking consumerism) now that I'm not surrounded by it. I am making myself a reminder of home.

Anyway, then we watched Inglorious Basterds. That was awesome, if a little slow at times. Watching Brad Pitt kill Nazis like a boss is very satisfying.

The internet connection at school kind of sucks. It's a disappointment.

Love always,
Clara

When there's nothing left to burn...

I've made a discovery. I believe in rock and roll, and music can save my mortal soul. Although I'm not sure whether I could teach you how to dance real slow.

The new crop-

My Beautiful Rescue - This Providence

Safe in the Sound - The Paper Raincoat

Strictly Game - Harlem Shakes

Your Ex-Lover Is Dead - Stars

7/4 (Shoreline) - Broken Social Scene

Hello My Apple - Priscilla Renea

(Happy, David? I like the song too!)

At the beginning of 'Your Ex-Lover Is Dead' there's an interesting line-

"When there's nothing left to burn, you must set yourself on fire"

I feel like I've been living by that rule for the last couple months. There was nothing left to burn. Everything was kind of falling away. So I did all I could do.

I felt a little bit like Nero. Or Hamlet. Or rather, Ophelia. I was most certainly Clara-gone-mad.

I'm still waiting for the embers to die down, I suppose. Here it's not like there's nothing left to burn, it's more that I am all there is. The only thing here that I'm completely familiar with is myself. If I am setting something on fire, it is me.

I love fire though. I'm a total pyromaniac. I could watch a bonfire for hours and never get bored or antsy, just watching the flames. The best stories are told around fires. There's something that seems mystical about it. I don't know exactly.

Love always,
Clara

Epic battle...

Mega-Julia vs. Giant Octo-Julia

via The Nerdist

I felt compelled to share. I have this image in my head now of a Meryl-Streep-Octopus COOKING. It is really truly bizarre.

Love always,

Clara

A funny form of nostalgia

Here is one of the great things about blogging: You can look back. I've been keeping some sort of blogger blog since the beginning of freshman year, as I've mentioned. The old one was more about my own personal dramas and crises and mental breakdowns. I've had a mental breakdown or two on this blog as well, but that one was full of them.

I think I was more prone to mental breakdowns anyway at that age.

Anyway, a thing I like to do sometimes is think, "One year ago, where was I? Two years ago, where was I?"

Reading the blog posts from then, I remember writing them, and it doesn't feel like so long ago.

But I just read the ones from almost exactly two years ago and wow. Poor 15-year-old-Clara. I was a mess.

I was just beginning to wander into some problems, and I saw it coming.

Direct quote: "I tend to ruin everything. Not on purpose, but by nature"

My god. Does anyone remember emo Clara? I know she must have existed for a moment!

So that's a little jarring. I think every August throws me off a little. August is the worst month. I've been having fun lately, but this month in general was basically madness and angst and turmoil. Last year I was trying to figure myself out. And two years ago... I was a mess.

Three years ago I don't know what I was doing. I was probably just nervous about playing field hockey.

Thank god I got out of that. If there is one thing that can reliably bring me down, it is athleticism. Maybe that was my problem two years ago. Pre-season angst.

Anyway, there's a fun little diversion into my mental health. Apologies for the potentially awkward TMI. I felt compelled.

Love always,
Clara

I am having fun.

You know, I thought it would be a while before I made friends here and whatnot.

I think it's going faster than I'd anticipated.

Also, I've been reading the blog where this guy tells cute animals what's what and it's incredible. It makes me want to talk smack to every cute animal I see. And I don't go around talking smack to cute animals very often. I don't talk smack much at all. I think that's the first time I've even used the phrase "talk smack" in a semi-serious manner.

I'm in love with my new phone. I kind of want to name her Sicily, although I know that's a name for a place, not a person. Not that my phone is a person. I think the fact that my phone isn't a person means that I can name her whatever I want.

(Because my phone is definitely a she)

Love always,
Clara

Muribad

That means 'the swimming pool that's a long-ass walk' in german. Sort of.

Went there today. Met some more people. Had fun.

Real Conversation-

Jessica: Oh remember that one time, he was like "I'm brooding". I was like, "'brooding'? Isn't that what chickens do before they want to lay eggs?" And he said "I'm contemplating" and I was like "contemplating laying eggs? Alright then"

I met some school administrators in person today, and one of them reminds me of Murray from Flight of the Conchords like you would not believe. Of course, he's from New Zealand. It may just be the accent.

Love always,
Clara

The first Real Conversation in der schweiz

Danny: (something about Kelly Osbourne)

Me: Oh, she's going to be on Dancing with the Stars!

Banjo: What? She has SARS?

I keep forgetting that TV is different here.

And yes, there is a kid named Banjo. He's probably tired of hearing that.

Love always,
Clara

Another thing that is better now than before

Before we had the necessary transformers and wireless connections, I had no music. I had my ipod, sure, okay, but I couldn't play music out loud the way I like to.

Now I can. Which makes me happy.

Speaking of music, here's my current playlist:

Lasso - Phoenix

Life on the Ground - Teddy and Ramin (I found it on facebook and like it a lot, actually)

Paparazzi - Lady GaGa

We Are Your Friends - Justice

When You're Ready - Kate Earl

Golden Street - Kate Earl

Melody - Kate Earl

Love always,
Clara

Real life.

I went out tonight and met real live kids who really live here.

And going out to the movies with them made me a kid who really lives here.

Which is pretty cool.

I still won't be completely settled until school starts, naturally. But this is a start.

Also, I got to skype with Isabella and Daphna. So that is a very good thing for my mental health.

Love always,
Clara

A better mood

We got wireless. I can now be an Internet addict in peace. We also got phones (iPhones! Yay!) so essentially I am thrilled. Friends, Romans, countrymen, skype me. I have a meeting at school tomorrow (regarding the insanity that is my education) so the wheels are in motion.

Also, I got that quadcam app Sam had so much fun with in Nantucket. I'm a fan.

And yes, that is my bunny slipper.

Love always,
Clara

Out and about

I miss home. That's a fact.
This place is at once boring and overwhelming.
I know that opinion will change, but for now, that's it.

I went into town today. I went with Steph and Trey and we were going to go to Interlaken but at the last minute I realized I had no desire to go to Interlacken at all, so I walked around by myself for a bit and then I went back home. They're probably there. I hear it's beautiful but the train was crowded and gross and I didn't have my iPod and I just didn't see the point. I'll go sometime. I'm here for two years. I'll see the mountains.
I found myself at a 'kiosk' store (which is roughly 7/11 or CVS equivalent). They didn't realize I didn't speak german there, and they kept talking, and I was like "ja, danke". I bought a Fanta and a KinderJoy thing. Those are fun. I get immense satisfaction from assembling the little toy things. I probably should have grown out of that years ago, but it's still fun.

I also miss people. We still have no wireless (although the landline computer is fixed) and that's killing me. I'm not using Patrick. I'm on this stupid PC that freezes when I try to read Gizmodo. I want to skype with people. Not that anyone's awake.
And the really annoying part is that as soon as I talk to anyone I know I'll just end up talking about how great it is here. It is. But it also sucks.
BLJKLSJDGH I don't know what I'm saying.

Love always,
Clara

What I did today

Today I woke up. I came downstairs and had raisin brain with 1% milk, which is one more percent milk than I'm used to. And I sat at the table while my dad played his St. Valentine's Massacre map games, which he just loves. I hate them, more because I hate maps than because I hate games. I don't hate games.

Then around noon we went out. We went to the Banhofplatz (or something like that, meaning train-station-plaza) and tried to buy phones, but we realized we probably needed someone who spoke german and regardless, one has to wait three weeks to get an iPhone in Switzerland, and that's what we're getting. My phone at home was cracked and fragile, a sad state of affairs for a krazr (or however they spelled it) I'd had since freshman year.

Then Mom and Dad and Steph and Trey went for a hike, and Grace and I stayed home. I messed around on the computer for a bit, felt tired, made myself some coffee (which is really good here) and sat down in front of the TV, except I couldn't figure out how to change the channel, so I ended up watching golf.
Then I went to my room and read my AP Psych test prep book. Because... I had nothing better to do.

Then we had dinner and it was lasagna and it was completely delicious. Beyond comprehension.

I need school to start soon. I am kind of really bored here.
It didn't help that almost everything is closed on sunday. They don't believe in leaving your house on sunday I guess.

Love always,
Clara

Here I am.

We made it.
I'm running on four hours of airplane sleep and two cups of coffee. I'm not sure how long it'll last me but I want to stay awake until bedtime so that my sleep cycles won't suck. Because right now, they suck.

Unpacking was weird. It was like unpacking for camp except with way more clothes.
That's all I have to say for now.

My brain is non-functioning.

Love always,
Clara

Naked romps lead to jail

Vivian and I have a little band going. We sing this song and we sing "I wish I were Jon Hoh" and we can also sing "I'm yours" and we need a name.

We were thinking of "Nerds in New York" except that we've never been to New York together.

Anyway, naked romps do lead to jail.

Love always,
Clara

Wed Cam

A conversation between Daphna and I

I'm the pink one.

Love always,
Clara

FINALLY SOMEONE UNDERSTANDS

AT LAST!

xkcd gets it. When I'm tired, weird things happen.

Example:

If only I could explain this to anyone else. Being really tired really truly messes with my brain.

Love always,
Clara

nantucket video. that's how cool i am.

I actually think this is gorgeous. The colors of that particular island are just wonderful, you know? The blues and the greens.

Song credits:

All these things that I've done- Sung by The Killers

Tachyon Theme- LG15

Yellow Submarine- Butchered by Us.

Mom and I were just downstairs watching TV. It was this awful show about this guy who steals women's underwear and then puts them in a car and waits for that car to get hit by a truck, so that it's like the woman is being raped by a truck. Or something twisted like that. We weren't entirely sure of what was happening, but we decided with almost no evidence that the woman also repeatedly beat her husband with a hammer.

The kids still in nantucket just called me. I wish I were still there. Like, I really wish I were still there. And not here. Packing. More.

Love always,
Clara

Lightsabers and the like

Someone asks me a question-

Dear Clara,

I have a problem. I seem to be obsessed with my new lightsaber, and I'm not entirely sure how I should handle it. My brother and I have considered making a short Star Wars film using said lightsaber. I would like CTY children to be in this film, but it appears as though they're all FUCKING LEAVING ME. What do I do?

Dear Vivian,

I understand your obsession with this lightsaber for many reasons. The first is that lightsabers are cool, and the second is that I have lived with a person who has been completely and totally obsessed with star wars. I don't know who this CTY child thinks she is, abandoning you when there are clearly star wars things to be done, but she does not know what she is missing.

Or perhaps she does. In which case, she thinks that you two should also write a song about light sabers, right after you write a song about naked romps.

But this is all made more complicated by the fact that she is, in fact, leaving on friday.

Not that I know who she is or anything.

Love always,
Clara

Literally.

Obama is literally Hitler

(so funny)

I flew back today. I'm at home now.

Last day of German is tomorrow.

How do I feel about moving? It's something like skydiving. I know I'm not going to die. And I know that at some points I'll love it and at other points I'll be terrified and wonder "why did I ever think this was a good idea?" but in the end I'll say to myself, "That was worth doing, if only because it's a good story to tell"

Although right now I'm at the point right before you jump when you're looking over the edge and thinking "hm, now that you mention it, I think my house is on fire. Er... um, I've got herpes! I'd better go, really"

There's a metaphor for you.

Love always,
Clara

Overheard playing Halo

Nick: We don't all know your fancy lock-on technique, Sam

(later)

Nick: I learned the technique! And it worked... like a peach

John: How do peaches work?

Nick: I don't know. Well, I'm guessing.

That real conversation is a lot better when Nick has a British accent. It just sounds classier. Even Halo sounds classy with a British accent.

I played a round. I had two kills. Sam and Nick had 24 and 25 respectively. I'm not very good at that game.

The problem with that game is that you have no peripheral vision. It's like you can see the two feet in front of you and that's it. It's awful. In real life, I would have had way more kills. Not that I go about killing people in real life, but it would be easier.

I sound creepy.

But it's late at night and I'm not prone to making sense.

Dinner was fun tonight.

Avery: Where are we going?

Me: ... We're going headlong into the future!

Nick: You are strange.

Claire: Why are you guys outside?

Me: It's breezy, it's beautiful..... it's covergirl.

Love always,
Clara

Beach day!

We spent essentially the entire day at the beach today. It was awesome

Real Conversation-

Me: I love being in the waves, being tossed about by nature

Katie: Yeah, I love getting pounded by the waves

Cath: (having dived under a wave between the words 'pounded' and 'by') WHAT?

Quotes without context-

• Me: John, your kabobs are exposed
• Everyone: WE ALL LIVE IN A YELLOW SUBMARINE

Now some of us are playing halo. I go home tomorrow. A shame.

Love always,
Clara

John bikes too fast

Best video ever.

Love always,
Clara

Be a good person

I'M IN NANTUCKET. Life is good.

Quote without context-

Me: No. Be a good person Sam. Leave it unprotected.

Already I have had seafood and napped on the beach. The next three days are going to be awesome.

Love always,
Clara

Making impromptu decisions.

I am going to nantucket.

I did not really know this until today.

But I have booked a flight and I am leaving tomorrow morning and coming back tuesday and this might just make my summer.

Also I bought two books today. Does life get better?

In other news, twitter is still down. Or rather, my texts aren't going through. Which makes me look like a twitter slacker. Which I am not, thank you very much.

I leave for Switzerland in one week. It is weird.

Love always,
Clara

Some random pieces of information

I leave in one week.

We got our chandeliers and other brass items polished, in preparation for the new renter man (whom we know)

Mom: Look at that knocker!

Mom and I: *giggles*

I was walking back to my car after german today and I didn't realize I was singing until I saw another person. That's awkward. I was singing pretty loudly.

Also, we are famous. Although I impatiently await the day that I am known for being more than one of "their two teenage girls."

... I would like to be both teenage girls.

Love always,
Clara

Ask me things!

People have problems and they want me to fix them! Sweet!

Here we go:

Hi Clara! I randomly came upon your blog this one time (ok that sounds totally sketch, but you know how it goes), and you were really funny. So I keep up with you. :)

Um I was hoping you could give me some advice. Ok so I have my guy best friend, right? His name's Ryan. Which isn't really important but whatevs. He's kinda rich, and his older brother (who has no job and lives in there basement...) is this like totally ridic star wars addict. Ok so Ry and I made this bet, and I lost. So now I have to wear his brother's star wars metal bikini...thing to this party. Um...what do I do??? Especially since my crush (whose name I'm not gonna say) is gonna be there?

Haha you were probably thinking you'd get no feedback/normal questions...but I just have weird friends I guess. How am I getting out of this one?

Love Always,
Sidney

PS: Seriously, your blog is amazing. And your dog seems just as amazing. Tell him I say hi :)

Dear Sidney,

My first reaction to this email was 'OH MY GOD I HAVE A READER WHO IS NOT MY FRIEND IN REAL LIFE! THIS IS COOL!'

My second was 'That bikini exists in real life?'

I googled it and found that there is even a website dedicated to the thing, www.leiasmetalbikini.com. So... you learn something new every day.

I suppose because you lost the bet you have to do it, but it depends on the weight of the bet. Like, earlier this year Isabella lost a bet regarding grades on a spanish test, and she had to bake Brendan a cake. It wasn't that serious a bet, but Isabella likes to bake anyways, and when she makes cakes she goes all out with decorations and the like. It's pretty awesome.

So if it was a non-legit bet, just don't deal with it I guess. But if it's serious... I guess you might as well just rock the Princess Leia look. If anything, it proves you're brave?

I tend to have no shame, so... I'm probably not the person to ask.

Although I'd probably bring a change of clothes to said party, if only because you'll probably get cold.

And I'm still baffled that your friend's brother has said metal bikini thing. The website I found like, custom makes them, and they're pretty expensive. I wouldn't buy one unless I intended to wear it. I don't know, maybe Ryan's brother is into that kind of thing.

I'm going to stop thinking about that because I don't know this kid and I feel kind of sketchy wondering about it.

Love Always,

Clara

P.S. Chili says hi!

That was fun! Let's do another!

One of my best friends is moving far far away, but not to fairytale land. Since she is stupid, she is not visiting me in Mass, and apparently has better things to do. How should I make fun/punish her for her insolence?

Hi Sam.

Katie's mom lobbied my mom. I may be sleeping on your front porch pretty soon.

Be excited.

Love always,
Clara

Dresses and what we do in them.

The official event was today.

Viv and Daph are here.

We went to this party for my dad, and then we peaced out in our cocktail dresses and drove to Del Ray. We were really there for the Dairy Godmother, but we wanted actual dinner too, because the party didn't have much. It was more of an appetizer scene. Little tiny shrimp things and south american cheese with fruit on top. And this watermelon-cheese-olive thing.

Anyways, we wanted actual food. So we drove to Del Ray and figured we'd find food there.

We did, at this cafe type place. I got a tuna sandwich.

And then we went to Dairy Godmother, and ate ice cream.

In cocktail dresses.

We got some pretty awesome looks. And I had a little conversation with the cafe guy about how we'd just come from a lame party with no real food. And some construction workers probably thought we were prostitutes, and this random guy on his own front porch said hi to us as we walked buy.

We felt fun.

And now we're at home listening to good music and being silly and I love it.

Daphna: I want to touch your butt!

Love always,
Clara

Brought down to earth by a facebook quiz

I have always been pretentious. I think my parents made me that way by teaching me to read before anyone else, so I could feel like the superior-and-unique-and-brilliant one in preschool.

That is the prelude to the story I am about to tell.

Today, (or rather, just now) I was poking around facebook. And I saw on my news feed, "Kayla has taken the quiz 'What stereotype do you fit?' with the result Cheerleader"

And I thought to myself, "Ah, I will take this quiz"

... And my inner self thought to my(inner)self, "Ah, I will take this quiz and get a super cool result that is different from anyone else's in an intellectual and creative way, because I am special, and I live in a world of less interesting and creative people"

But don't tell anyone that.

So I took the quiz. And my result? Cheerleader. Not too unexpected I guess... I figured it was this quiz's way of saying "nice person" (as opposed to the result "Prep/Jock" which basically means "mean person").

But the results page, like most facebook quiz result pages, showed me the outcomes of several of my facebook friends. And I scroll through and realize the rest of my facebook friends are 80% Hipsters, 15% Nerd, and 5% Loner.

CONTRARY TO MY LONG-ESTABLISHED BELIEFS, I AM A LONE CHEERLEADER IN A SEA OF HIPSTERS.

How did that happen?

Speaking of facebook, I just uploaded an album of pictures I found from freshman trip. If anyone has forgotten exactly how awkward we were back then, I suggest you check it out.

And speaking of pictures, I got a new camera today! And it's a PowerShot SD780 and it's amazing and I'm kind of in love.

And speaking of incest... never mind.

Also, I did bake this blog a birthday brownie, and I filmed myself doing it, so that video will be up in the next four days. But tomorrow is very busy.

Love always,
Clara

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOVE ALWAYS CLARA

One year of blogging insanity.

I spilled my coffee on myself today.

Mom: You need to change your shirt. You look like you're on an island.

Me: An island?

Mom: Yeah, like one of those survivor shows. But you didn't survive coffee break!

Expect a blog-brownie. Blogwnie? No. 

That was a terrible portmanteau.

Love always,
Clara

P.S. This is blog post 700. Wow.

A noise!

There was, just now, A LOUD NOISE.

Mom: Clara, I think you should come down from the third floor.

Me: What? Why?

Mom: Remember when I was in that house and the roof caved in? It made a sound like that.

Me: But there's no caved in roof

Mom: But maybe it's about to cave in

Me: So it made the noise in advance?

Later...

Mom:It might be that the ghost is mad we're leaving

Me: That's entirely possible

Mom: (to the ghost) Don't be mad, we have a very good friend coming. Don't worry. He's very nice

In other news, I had lunch with an old friend today. Whom I hadn't seen in a solid two years, and had only known for three weeks even then. But that was irrelevant. It was fun. I feel like we're sort of on the same wavelength anyways, so it wasn't an issue that it had been so long.

It's great when that happens.

And it was probably the most normal afternoon I've had in a long while, and I definitely needed that, what with all of the moving insanity.

Love always,
Clara