universitat

I've been stalking my "Admitted Students, class of 2014" facebook group.

I'm loving it.

Isabella and I went to see a movie today, and found ourselves at Nordstrom's. She always recognizes the designers, knowing what's a rip-off of what, and all of that. She's got very expensive taste.

I have pretty cheap taste. Or, rather, I hope I don't look cheap, but I get so much more pleasure out of buying my gorgeous prom shoes at Marshall's for $30 than spending more money and taking the easy way out.

Anyway, we started talking about college, and how awesome it's going to be. Something about high school is very judgmental, she said. And I agree. Although, I pointed out, judgementalness doesn't end in high school. Crazy social constructs always exist, and probably always will.

That said, there's just something about high school.

I think I said that in Switzerland, I wasn't worried about people judging me.

And then I think I took it back, because obviously that would have been a lie.

More accurately, I had to be content with their judgments, because they were judging me based on the present. Whereas I feel like a lot of people at Potomac judge each other based on the past. I still remember who slighted me in seventh grade, and I'd like to say I don't hold it against them, but every once in a while... I don't know. Some people don't seem like they've changed.

But I'm sure they have! I know they have! And the only reason they don't seem like it to me is because I keep perceiving them the way they were!

So that's my fault.

And we're all victims of it.

I showed up here in first grade, and to some degree I'm paranoid that Dori still thinks of me as that girl in Ms. Hirsch's class who peed her pants.

Because I totally did, and I know first grade was probably too old to be doing that sort of thing, because Dori sure set me straight.

And I don't hold it against her! Really! But, for the unacquainted with K-12 schools, imagine having a whole lifetime to build up little insecurities.

When I was in lower school, I had this (seemingly valid) hope that Potomac would sprout a college, so that I wouldn't have to leave.

Can you imagine what a nightmare that would be?

So here's to college, and to being judged based on who we are (and not who we were), so that we really have no right to complain.

Love always,

Clara