So what's the deal with...

... teen angst?

Grace insisted we listen to her music on the drive home from the AWESOME 7th/8th grade musical. They did 'Guys and Dolls' and yes, it was adorable.

Anyway, Grace is in that evanescence phase. 

I had that phase. I had that moment when "Everybody's Fool" seemed the perfect metaphor for my oh so dramatic life. But at least that song doesn't imply killing oneself is a good idea.

I guess the newer album is... like that.

I don't know.

Here's the thing. I've found that phase tends to occur, if it does occur, between 6th and 8th grade.

Which is when the girls are meanest and I know I looked and felt awkward. 

But it's also when your stress levels are relatively low.

So what's the deal with this "omg my life is so hard" teen angst?

Love always,
Clara

25 things

So this is a facebook note, technically.

But I've taken a liking to doing facebook notes on the blog. So here we go.

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you
(Except forget all that tagging business. This is a blog)

1. I am addicted to gum. It's a serious problem.

2. I wear axe deodorant, basically because I like the smell better than the girly flowery stuff.

3. Until about seventh grade, I slept with a doll named charlotte. Or rather, in seventh grade I stopped bringing her to sleepovers.

4. I still have my three CTY lanyards braided together on my bookshelf. And my 2007 Dickinson mealcard is in my wallet

5. My dad ran for governor when I was in preschool. I always kind of wonder how my life would have been different if he had won.

6. Today I ate french fries. This is very much not allowed (for health reasons) but oh, they were good.

7. Most of the books on my bookshelf are from long ago. I wish I had more time to read nowadays.

8. I hate judgmental people. Which makes me a hypocrite.

9. In 4th grade, my teacher was so stupid/inept that I wanted to drop out of school.

10. I'm more artistic than people would think.

11. I really like mellow music.

12. I have this fantasy that college will be like camp, but with more people and more classes and more freedom. This may be slightly realistic, considering I go to nerd camp.

13. My dad has nine fingers. I always find that cool.

14. I'm really good at the game "2 truths and a lie".

15. I love puzzles and mysteries. Lonelygirl15 was a good outlet for the conspiracy theorist in me, but its run its course and now I'm in the market for another.

16. I'm kind of concerned that I've grown out of infatuation. Which is something I really enjoy. So this is a shame.

17. I love going to CVS. I don't know why.

18. I've found the universe arranges itself so that I will be happy. Don't try to talk me out of this. I have very little evidence but a chain of strange coincidences. But that's my theory and I'm sticking to it.

19. I'm not religious. But I think there's something. (see above)

20. I don't tend to throw things out. I may become like my great uncle. He like, collects newspaper and string.

21. I'm a huge introvert, but I also love attention.

22. I'm convinced that my eventual fame is inevitable.

23. Prime numbers are awesome.

24. I started a twitter-esque notebook (in which I would write down short notes/thoughts) at the beginning of this summer to keep my head on straight. The internet has been a godsend.

25. This survey has been great, because I really like to talk about myself.... I should be denying it, but whatever. It's the truth.

Love always,
Clara

Mom and Feminism...

Mom mentioned me on her show

They were talking about the PETA ad and she horribly misquoted me... She's the blonde one.

Of course my mom is the blonde one on the feminist show.

Anyways, she showed me the link and we got to talking about feminism.

I didn't think the PETA ad was sexist. I thought it was scandalous, but not sexist. If you watch the clip all the women are saying how PETA thinks they're only talking to men, and women are being objectified.

I felt like it was saying "Hey, you too can be a sexy powerful vegetarian!" to women. Which other companies have been doing for years (replace 'vegetarian' with 'purse-owner' and see what I mean).

Mom: Well remember when [redacted] was saying you were promiscuous?

Me: Oh, she wasn't really. She was just saying I was, among [small group of nice girls], most likely to be.

Mom: I was so mad!

Me: Eh. I liked it. It means I'm pretty.

Mom: *shakes head in feminist disbelief*

Love always,
Clara

This was today

Musical practice.

Will said a bad word. Dominique was offended. Mr. B cleverly used synonyms to prove his point. It was a typical day in the neighborhood... or rather, island... or rather, black box theater. 

Love always,
Clara

This was yesterday

How inappropriate.

And yes, I do go to CVS to relax. It's more the walking there by myself that clears my head. It's something I usually reserve for weekends, but every once in a while I make a weeknight trip. If I really need it.

Love always,
Clara

Silly silly silly

I should do something productive but I don't really want to. 

I'm going to read something about netflix or something.

Love always,
Clara

Chemistry+Latin=Sex

Wait, what?

Wow, I'm sexual today.

(on that note, this was said to me today: "Wow, no WONDER you're the goddess of virginity!")

Anyway... things happened in chem today.

Ann: I loved Ms. Drake

Jess: Me too! Summer after 7th grade, she did me!

Ann: ... Wait, what?

That's Ann. That kind of says it all about Ann, and our chem class in general.

At the end of class...

*The bell rings*

Mr. H: Oh lord help me.

Love always,
Clara

More on vegetarians

Hey, at least this guy can know he's having better sex than that jerk boss.

On a completely unrelated note, you know what's frustrating?

When one of your more peculiar quirks is due to something that is actually a secret, and you are a person who likes to explain your quirks to people (usually for their benefit).

So you're explaining and have to... trail off...

I mean, I trail off a whole bunch anyways, long attention span isn't one of those quirks, but it's annoying.

I hate having secrets.

I would like to tell everyone everything about my life.

Why? I don't know. But I mean, I keep a blog. You'd probably figured that out already.

Anyway, it's probably a good thing that I have the restraint to keep some things to myself. Still though. Ugh.

Love always,
Clara

Events of the past five minutes

At school.

First time since monday.

Sam has no soul. He doesn't like the song "Love Story" which is seriously among the most amazing awe-inspiring songs... ever. Up there with like, Felix Mendelssohn and "Where is the love".

Quote without context:

Reilley: I just sit there and like, wear lavender sweaters

Shoutout to Amelia.

Sam says: Amelia, say something retarded without context!

Eunichs. Nantucket. I am tired. And maybe I do look like a green apple but this jacket makes me happy. So WHATEVER.

Paul just tried to stab Sam with a green highlighter.

Love always,
Clara

Reason #1

... why I fail at life

So we were supposed to have a latin test on tuesday. Snow happened. Then it would have been today. Snow happened again.

So I suppose it will be tomorrow.

A crazy person would have spent the whole time studying. I trust there are no real people who do that (at least that I know)

A good person would have said "wow, I have an extra day (or two) to study for this test. I'll devote a couple hours to it, and then enjoy my snow day"

A Clara person would say "HEY COOL SNOW! I'M GOING TO BE LAZY AND READ MAGAZINES AND TAKE PICTURES AND ALSO READ SOME SARTRE!" until about 10 PM, at which case she would say "Oh, I suppose that latin test will be tomorrow... Crap. I shall study for as long as my attention span allows, which is about fifteen minutes... and then study on the bus! If I'm not sleeping... or listening to music... Crap"

I need to stop being such a Clara person, and start being a good person. Not a crazy person, but a good person.

Although, I value my Clara-person-ness. Not necessarily in this particular situation, but usually my Clara-person-ness works out for the best.

Bah. I have no idea what I'm talking about, and I should be studying for that latin test, but instead I'm complaining about how I'm not studying. I am so backwards.

Love always,
Clara

Proven Fact.

So this is the most inappropriate thing I've ever seen.

But hey, one more reason to go veggie!

Theory: If they won't play it during the super bowl, it's bad.

Warning: It really is that bad. But watch it anyway, because it's hilarious.

Love always,
Clara

Dreams between the hours of 6 and 9

I had this dream that a person pretended to be stuck to me so that he could turn invisible.

Wait, what?

And then someone said I had a hot date, and I thought they meant the invisible person stuck to me, but they really meant my art teacher (who was an invention of the dream) who was at that moment cross dressing. And pregnant.

Then--I suppose this was another dream--I was at our summer place (super small maryland town).

And there were actually waves at the thing we call the "beach".

Then I played with Aunt Kathy's camera. And she had binoculars too, which I basically stole to spy on our neighbors playing dodgeball. Some of them were in like, white puffy things, and others were in really nice clothes.

And then I realized I recognized a bunch of people from school, and I hadn't realized that they were friends with my neighbors.

Then one person who was from school but I don't remember who (probably another invention of my mind, but I remember wondering "how does that person from school know my neighbors?") walked over and stuck something on my back. And the thing was a newspaper clipping of cool things about Williams. It was a nice gesture.

Then the person and my sister and I went for a walk, and we wanted to all lie down in the grass at this L-shaped park, but some other people decided they wanted to play lacrosse.

Except that the shoes they were wearing were too big, and the lacrosse balls they were using were too small, and everything was dangerous for someone lying down in the middle of their field.

Except that it was OUR field.

I explained to the school person that I got my independence here. He said he got his in atlanta, which doesn't make much sense.

I know when this dream happened because it was after I woke up to my alarm clock and discovered we didn't have school today, but before I woke up once and for all (ten minutes ago).

Before 6 o clock, I was having a dream about something with chorus, and Summer was trying to organize a chorus dinner. I had to pick up the phone to get details on this dinner, but as soon as I was about to pick up the phone, my alarm went off. It was quite disappointing.

Love always,
Clara

And they also sell those swedish meatballs...

Ikea just won the Clara award for "most brilliant marketing scheme EVER"

Love always,
Clara

"Don't Forget About Us" - the music game

Usually I reserve this kind of thing for facebook notes... But I feel compelled. Don't judge me.

1. Put Your iTunes on Shuffle.
2. For each question, press the 'next' button to get your answer.
3. You must write down the name of the song no matter how silly it sounds!
4. Put any comments in brackets after the song name.

What do your friends think of you?
Gigolo- Nick Cannon

Um... Cool

If someone says, “Is this okay?” You say?
Poses - Rufus Wainwright

So I pose? Kind of accurate.... oh, I'm getting deep and personal already!

How would you describe yourself?
White Christmas- Stacie Orrico

So I'm pale and ... christian? Not quite, iTunes. 1 for 2.

What do you like in a guy/girl?
Ain't No Other Man - Christina Aguilera

Monogamy is indeed a value of mine... lol

How do you feel today?
Coming Clean - Hilary Duff

Well, I did do yoga today.
(We interrupt this broadcast for a Real Conversation

Isabella and I: *singing that song*

Me: Let it wash away my sanity

Isabella (simultaneously): Let it wash away my celity

Isabella: Oh I was meaning to ask you, what's a 'celity'?

Me: ...sanity?

Isabella: Oh...... Oh god....

It shouldn't surprise me that she's unfamiliar with this 'sanity' thing. I love that girl)

What is your life’s purpose?
3 A.M. - Matchbox Twenty
Be an insomniac?

What is your motto?
This Love - Maroon 5

Entirely possible. I'm kind of a generally (even platonic) love-oriented person

What do you think about very often?
Living in Your Letters - Dashboard Confessional

The past? I do have a nostalgic disposition

What is 2 + 2?
They're trying to get ready - Eddie from Ohio

I guess I need some preparation before I do any serious math

What do you think of your best friend?
Fall for You - Secondhand Serenade

And... I'm going to fall in love with my best friend? What best friend is this?

What do you think of the person you like?
Beautiful Girls Reply - Jojo

OH PRICELESS. First line is "I'm way too cool for you boy, that's why it'll never work"

What is your life story?
The Dance of the Cucumber - Veggie Tales

EVEN BETTER.

What do you want to be when you grow up?
No Such Thing - John Mayer

That actually makes sense. "Growing up" is overrated.

What do you think of when you see the person you like?
Catchers, Drummers, Anchormen - Eddie from Ohio

I think this means I would consider such a person reliable. Sure.

What will you dance to at your wedding?
City Lights - Jojo

Sure. And wow, my 6th grade music tastes are really coming out in this thing.

What will they play at your funeral?
Get Out Of My Head - Jag Star

People will not be able to stop thinking about me. Cool. Although they'll want to. Not cool.

What is your hobby/interest?
Check Yes Juliet - We the Kings

Running away with secret lovers? Yes please.

What is your biggest fear?
Tubthumping - Chumbawamba

Don't ask me...

What is your biggest secret?
Bullets - Tunng

Well that sounds creepy/ominous. What does iTunes know that I don't?

What do you think of your friends?
Twenty Thousand Hearts - Eddie from Ohio

Yay I love my friends dearly!

What will you post this as?
Don't Forget about Us - Mariah Carey

Done.

That was slightly embarassing.

Courtesy of Aubrey Sabala

Love always,
Clara

Recession marketing

Two great things about this economic crisis:

1) The random cheap ads on tv (which are hilarious) are becoming more common. Example:

I just saw an advertisement for car insurance.

Image of a house at night, with two lights in the windows

Female voice: Honey, it's after midnight! What are you doing?

Male voice: I'm buying car insurance!

Female voice: Really?

... later...

Male voice: And I'm done!

Female voice: Great! Can you bring me some cheese puffs?

Like... what?

2) Bought some magazines today (went out, walked in the snow, got some tea, dropped off film, the standard cvs run). And the magazines felt... thin.

The advertisements are... less so. Same amount of content, fewer ads. Which I prefer.

Just because it's a side effect of a recession, doesn't mean it isn't awesome.

Love always,
Clara

I lied!

Pessimist that I am (yeah right), I had assumed there wouldn't be any snow today. When I woke up it was just... wet and dreary and dark, so I figured snow was not a likely thing.

WRONG!

Although I had decided to go back to sleep... Chili had other plans...

Curiously, he decided he wanted to play with me at just about the very moment I decided to go back to bed.

Not appreciated.

But when a puppy's licking your face, it's really really hard to complain...

Love always,
Clara

Snow day!

Not that it's... you know... snowing... or anything...

I bet it is out in randomville. It tends to snow more in randomville than it does here. And kids at my school live out there.

(P.S. In the bottom left corner of that picture, that girl in the cat mask? That's me in the closing scene of By Jeeves. We were doing Andrew Lloyd Webber references. I'm standing behind the Phantom of the Opera)

Can I just say how frustrating this is though? I'm not complaining (far from it) but I had woken up at 6 to go to breakfast club (which, as always, I was looking forward to). And I was already dressed, hair done, etc, about to get my backpack together when I hear my dad's phone ring. And I'm thinking "who calls my dad at 6:15 in the morning?" and then he calls upstairs and says...

"Clara? No school. Go back to sleep"

So I'm like...

"Really? Sweet! But oh god. Can you just come up and witness how completely ready I was?"

I mean, I was wearing snow boots just in case and everything.

I still am, actually. I won't waste this intense readiness on sleep. If I'm going to be this ready for... school/life/whatever, I'm going to be awake and appreciate it.

Although I don't think the rest of the fam appreciates myself clicking away up here at 6:35 AM...

Love always,
Clara

The EPIC story of Daphne and Apollo

I have a latin test tomorrow.

Here, let me summarize the poem of Daphne and Apollo:

Apollo had defeated a serpent and had some kind of rush of testosterone or whatever. So he saw cupid with his love-arrows and talked some shit, which was not appreciated by cupid, whose power was underestimated. And Cupid said "oh snap you just wait, I will mess you up" and fluttered away to the top of a mountain.

From that mountaintop, he shot two arrows. The golden love arrow was for Apollo, and the lead anti-love arrow was for Daphne, nymph daughter of Peneus, river nymph.

(Daphne is almost always referred to by her father's name, which probably pisses her off, because she's one of those uber-feminists).

So Daphne decides she wants to be like Diana (ironically Apollo's twin sister) and go live in the woods and hunt animals WITHOUT MEN around. She wants to be an unmarried virgin forever, so she pleads with her father (and in my sick mind she kind of seduces him, which is so backwards, but the description implies a kind of father-daughter relationship that I am unfamiliar with) and he finally promises her she can be a virgin forever, even though he wants little tiny Peneuses running around.

The thing about that is that according to Ovid, she is too pretty to be a virgin (In the words of Will, she must get married, or someone will rape her). Ovid was kind of weird. He changes his position on feminism like, every few lines. Or maybe he was just particularly in touch with the weird roman culture. Romans were weird.

Then Apollo chases her. And while he's chasing her, he's trying to reason with her, seeing as he is a very rational god. And she runs away, because she really would prefer not to be married/raped. Apollo, sick bastard, admires her limbs as she's running, and imagines how pretty her hair would look if she maybe added some styling product like he must, because his curly locks are always gorgeous.

At some point, when Apollo's getting close, Daphne asks her father to save her. So he turns her into a tree. A laurel tree.

Apollo won't quit though. He decides he loves the tree, and gives it all these honors. Like I said, sick.

I blame Apollo too much though. It's really all Cupid's fault.

Although Apollo brought that on himself. You don't mess with love.

Love always,
Clara

Oh, Steve

I just watched Steve Jobs's introduction of the 1984 macintosh. 

Am I a dork if I found it hilarious?

Am I a dork if I'm genuinely sad he's sick and therefore didn't speak at Macworld this year?

And am I a dork if the 1984 superbowl mac ad totally cracks me up, with that woman with the hair and whatnot?

Here's the more important question:

Is the answer to any question beginning with the words "Am I a dork if..." always going to be a resounding "YES"?

Um... Yes.

Love always,
Clara

Videos from yesterday

Part one: hanging out with Isabella. Always priceless

Part two: Actually at the dance. I think my brain was addled by the strobe lights and jumping

(Featuring Kayla, Nick M., Mo, Robert, Zander, various others)

Part three: Myself walking to the car

Love always,
Clara

Like, four dreams

So I was trying to convince someone from california to stay where I was for one more day. Involving camp. But it was also exam week, and my extra day had to do with my chem exam, and I wanted him to stay so that I could see him again.

And for some reason unknown to me, a person who has never been to my camp, but heard a lot about it, was there, and I kind of really wanted that person to see me with the other person.

And someone was trying to use alternating fruits to explain why it's just fine to leave camp, and how we were all just afraid of various things, but I jumped in with some blackberries  and blueberries and asserted that it was literally the best place on earth, so why leave?

And then I was hanging out with Blair Waldorf at the nice mall and we were having dinner with Chuck and his two really hot brothers. But she was pissed that they were there so we bailed. On our way out we walked through this place where they were playing Beatles music, and she told me we were going to go to a bar. I told her we were both driving.

Then later she realized that Chuck (who was now Edward Cullen) was going to propose to her because he had a thirteen-cent gold coin. So she was excited until Stewie (from family guy) took his American-Idol related angst out on her finger with some string and an x-acto knife. Nothing serious, but she had a paper cut where an engagement ring would go.

American Idol? It had something to do with a building with windows. People would talk to each other through these windows. I don't know.

Then, Dominique and I were starting a business in which we would put CDs into apples... because everyone would want to buy that! So I went and bought some apples I guess, but then my dad stole them. He wasn't my dad really though, he was the dad from that "curtis" comic strip.

Then my mom and I tried to drive to the beach. We wound up going through new york. And I guess when I got there I tried to set up a like, booking service, but realized I'd opened before I'd made any contacts. And I was in this little pink and yellow hut-tent like they have at the beach. And a woman was angry with me.

Then I partnered with an existing booking agency, and Chloe was there, and two emotional black men were going to have to fit themselves into a small space, but apparently they were good at it. We were still in that hut-tent thing.

And a man wanted us to walk to this place with 35 foot waves, when I really just wanted to get to wherever we were going. My mom was fine with it though... she has no diligence. 

I just woke up; therefore it's all fresh in my mind.

Weird weird weird dreams.

Love always,
Clara

Winter (in)Formal...

... was FREAKING AMAZING.

I seriously only planned to go because it's a fundraiser for one of the school newspapers (and my personal preference among the two, simply for its witty satire), and Mama Latin had been stressing about it.

But I went.

And it was great.

The thing I realized tonight that I really love about being single is that if, perchance, I had an involvement with a guy or whatever, I would have to think. Or rather, I would be inclined to think. Because I tend to think, usually too much, especially when guys are involved. But tonight it was dark and the lights were flashing and the music was really loud and I didn't care that my dress was kind of falling off because I was jumping up and down in a big crowd of people, and I didn't even recognize a lot of them, or bother to make out their faces, or whatever, because two seconds later they'd be gone, and wow this is a long sentence.

And that kind of freedom doesn't happen when you're thinking.

I was kind of high on life actually... I have a fear now that the teachers chaperoning could have gotten the wrong impression as to the source of my ebullience. Ebullience≈inebriation under the right circumstances. And I am under the impression that I would not have been the only one, were that the case.

Yay that was fun. Unexpected fun on a saturday night is always the best kind.

Love always,
Clara

Squash

Me: She plays squash

Vivian: THAT'S A VEGETABLE

Vivian: Rich people are weird

Love always,
Clara

Sushi and the gender barrier

I've made an effort to break the gender barrier in many of my classes lately. 

See, because we are all five year olds with cooties, we tend to divide ourselves by gender. Girls sit on one side of the room, guys on the other.

It's weird. And I'm so over it.

So occasionally I break the cycle, sit on the boys' side of the room, and see what comes of it. It's usually a positive experience, although there is significant risk of awkwardness if I don't place myself near at least one guy I know I can talk to.

It's less stifling, I suppose.

The thing is I'm so over the estrogen-fest. Isabella and I are tending to sit with the guys at lunch too, and I honestly have more fun. I mean, I'm glad I'm not alone doing it, because that would be awkward beyond my personal threshold, and the two of us are nice buffers for each other if it gets to weird. Regardless, a table full of guys discussing the gory details of scary movies and the logistics of various sexual acts is more entertaining to me than a table full of girls complaining about how much work they have, how stupid their teachers are, how bad the soup is, and how generally dissatisfied they are with their lives.

Girls take themselves too seriously. I include myself in that statement.

Guys don't think that much. It's brilliant.

I want them to teach me.

But then again I don't, because I don't trust myself with not-thinking.

On that note, I had sushi with Sam today.

Normal normal normal. Definition of normalcy. He was going to give me a ride to my car, and then decided he wanted to go to sushi, and needed a sushi buddy. Normal.

I come home and my parents are like "Oh so who was at Ichiban?" and I say "Sam" and they make assumptions. The way people tend to make assumptions about people having sushi. Or other food. Or whatever.

I didn't even eat sushi. I had edamame. 

But that's not the point. If I had gone with Isabella to Ichiban, as I have done, no one would have batted an eye, right? Right. But I was eating dinner with someone with a Y chromosome. Therefore... assumptions.

Here's what I say to assumptions: Whatever. I do what I want.

Love always,
Clara

Rave hat?

Me: Phillip what are you wearing?

Phillip: It's a rave hat.

Me: It's a felt witch hat

Lily: He's redefining rave

Love always,
Clara

It's a good day for a different sort of blog

I had that other blog. Today would have been a good day for it.

In physics we're talking about special relativity.

Mr C: (to our resident triplets, Cath and Sam [there is a third as well, Emily]) Who wants to become an astronaut?

Cath: Sam. Send him into space.

Mr C: Good idea.

Mr C doesn't like Sam...

Ann was having a moment today in chem. A 45 minute long moment.

"I like, radiate in your... radiation"

The context of this had nothing to do with science.

Later...

Ann: I feel like I'm four

Mr H: I feel like you're four too.

Love always,
Clara

in latin class

Apollo needs to get over himself.

Daphne is probably pretty pissed.

Reading Ovid. It's great.

Felt like blogging

Love always,
Clara

I am Steve Irwin.

Although... he died... well, I too would die for the sake of my brilliant wildlife show, brilliantly entitled "People in their natural habitat".

Behold!

Featuring: Myself, Kayla, Sarah and Samantha the freshmen (1), Rebecca the freshman (2), the Wills (3)

Oh, and I sound weird because I was really cold. Like, REALLY cold.

Love always,
Clara

Guess who's back?

Someone I missed a lot.

I actually can't tell you; you'd think I'm crazy. Actually.

You don't know her name anyway. But know that I'm excited, and I trust she's going to make life way more fun from now on.

This is someone who seriously and consistently brightens my day.

I had to write an essay on the inner workings of my mind today for the school college counsellors. I said I would post it on here, but then I turned it in by accident. Or I knew I was turning it in, but didn't realize that after I turned it in I wouldn't have it anymore.

Expect that february third. Seriously hit me up. I'm posting that thing. It was brilliance.

Honestly, I could have just given them a link here. This pretty accurately gets at how my mind works.

So guess what?

David's brain is a big empty auditorium.

That made my day. No joke. If I've referred to David in the past, or possibly "hilarious kid", this is who I'm referring to.

This video thing is good. Now you can know what my friends look like!

Love always,
Clara

100 things

Found online. The ones that are pink are things I've done. 

Random, boring, myspace-ish, whatever. I don't feel like doing homework.

1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke.
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class.
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a mobile phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Read an entire book in one day

Yay! My life is... 24% interesting.

That kind of sucks.

Note to self: Do these things.

Love always,
Clara

This morning was madness

Got up at 5.

Yes, this means I am very tired (so yes, be very afraid)

Crapcake? I don't know. Like I said, tiredness.

Orange? Again I blame it on the sleeplessness.

... and then something more interesting happened

So basically...

YAYYYYYYY!

And if you couldn't guess, I am now just about obsessed with video blogging. You have a lot to look forward to.

Love always,
Clara

Last night...

Went with Grace, her friend Cat, and Cat's mother to the "We are the Future" concert. 

Miley Cyrus+Jonas Brothers+3/4 the Obama family=best crowd ever.

Actually.

Don't judge me.

Love always,
Clara

Welcome to Washington, Mr. President

Can I just say that this country now has the best president ever as its own?

We are very lucky people.

I am home. Went to the inauguration, shivered, etc, got home relatively quickly because key bridge was open. I'm not sure why that is, but we were happy.

The parents are still out seeing as they have parties and balls tonight... their lives are fun.

Brrrrrr

Will upload videos in a little bit. Must organize them first.

Love always,
Clara

NFC luncheon...

Nothing gets my adrenaline pumping like a good old National Finance Committee luncheon.

Oh baby.

But it was at the same hotel that model congress was at, and I did some pretty significant video blogging.

Love always, 

Clara

Plus, he said you can't eat shellfish

I swear, is this girl me in ten years?

And another relevant question: am I a total stalker?

I guess that's the point...

I still don’t believe in the traditional judeo-christian anthropomorphic “guy with a beard” God.  But I believe in something.  I believe we’re not alone, and I believe this world isn’t random.  I believe in karma, and I believe in love - not the romantic, dopamine filled drug-like Valentine’s Day love, but the eternal, unconditional love that surrounds all of us.

via Julia Allison

a.k.a. my role model

This is a thing I have been grappling with recently (what, me grapple?)

A friend of mine asked me the other day, "Why don't you just admit you're an atheist?"

"Because I'm not, but I don't believe in god" didn't exactly sound like a bulletproof answer.

Here's the deal:

You know how most normal kids get bedtime stories? My dad told me stuff about science. I'm not joking. (I know. It explains a lot about why I am the way I am). So I had that background from a young age. Like, really young. Four? Five? Yeah.

I used to go to church with my parents. That kind of ended when Grace started getting more disruptive than socially acceptable. But I also became vehemently opposed to the idea. I'd heard enough and it all sounded like madness to me, and secretly I thought it was creepy how all the adults knew all the words. Like weird drone-robots took over when they were reading the creeds and prayers. It freaked me out. I didn't like the focus on god either. I was like, ten, and I was thinking "hey, why are we saying HE's so great? I'M great. WE'RE great. He doesn't do ANYTHING" 

And then I found out that sometimes people died for this stuff and it totally turned me off.

At the same time, a friend of mine was making the discovery that the gods we were studying in school (Norse, Greek, etc [she was a mythology fanatic in like, first grade]) were actually RELIGIONS back in the day. So she was asking "why is theirs fiction and ours real?" and coming to the conclusion "They must all be real!" which quickly turned into "They must all be fake!"

We were two incredibly enlightened fifth graders.

So I was a semi-militant atheist for a little while, but quickly adapted that to secular humanism after taking several online quizzes. And it fit better; atheism didn't suit me. I'm an optimist. And I've been calling it secular humanism since then, whatever it is I believe, but I'm not sure it fits.

Here's what I think. See if you can find a name for it:

I think that people are mostly good. I think that good things happen. I think that particularly if you have a good attitude (yes cliche I know) good things happen. And there is fate, but also free will, although I'm not exactly sure how that works itself out. I believe in love, and I actually legitimately love just about everybody I know. People are fantastic.

The universe is a good place, populated by good things and good people.

It's all good.

That doesn't necessarily mean there's a god pulling the strings. That just doesn't make any sense to me. And I know people say "Oh, of course it doesn't make sense, that's why you have faith" but honestly, that idea makes even less sense to me.

I haven't found a religion that suits me yet. Maybe I will. Maybe I'll start one. I'm good at making up thought experiments, and in my personal opinion that's really the most helpful part of religion, the new perspectives, so maybe I've got a career laid out for me.

But I'm thinking I might bring this post up in Breakfast Club.

Love always,
Clara

LINCOLN MEMORIAL CONCERT

Amazing.

Absolutely amazing.

Mom and I were in the fifth row. I took a lot of video (which I will upload as soon as I figure out how... blogger is hating me).

I've been closer to more celebrities today than I've ever been in my LIFE.

And they were all awesome.

Just watched "Baby Mama" with mom. It's hilarious. I had low expectations, but it was truly hilarious.

Love always,

Clara

Ever wondered...

What my random assorted goals are?

This website is cool. You basically list things you want to do, and then people say how they did it and like, cheer you on.

43 things

In theory, it's motivational, right?

Well, we'll find out.

Love always,
Clara

So who would have thought...

... when I was blogging the Democratic National Convention that just months later I'd be blogging the Inauguration. 

I didn't. I mean, I thought/hoped we would win, but it hadn't occurred to me that I'd be blogging it. I hadn't thought that far.

Tonight I went with the parents to a NFC cocktail party, and then the PIC's 'late night entertainment', which was supposed to be like, Beyonce, but she cancelled...

Loser.

So there was a DJ and it was less fun than it could have been, but not bad.

Very loud.

Tomorrow I'm going to a brunch and then the concert at the Lincoln Memorial. That's going to be cool. I'll twitter it.

Love always,
Clara

So it's after midnight

and I find myself on wikipedia...

Wow.

Dude.

I want to start one.

Love always,
Clara

I just rediscovered...

My music collection from before I had an ipod.

My old CD case was in my mom's closet, along with my yellowgold cd player. Why I was digging around my mom's closet is a long story (rumored hidden candy was involved) but this is what I found.

And I realized my cousin was in a sweet a cappella group in college. I had their album. They were good.

Love always,
Clara

Nostalgia

Vivian: Remember CTY city?

Me: YES. Please. Build it. Find it. Invite me. Like, seriously, can you establish a utopian society and just make it CTY people?

Vivian: Yeah, and we can snuggle together for warmth

Love always,
Clara

Hilarity of math class

So today we were talking about probability... 

If you figure there are fourteen in the class, counting Mr. C, it's a 45 minute period, and every five minutes, there is a probability of .0075 that something funny will happen to one person...

9*14*.0075=.945

hilarity had a 95% chance of ensuing.

It did. Twice. And the probability of that happening is only .893!

So here we go...

Class: *makes crazy tree diagrams*

Me: Mine looks like a genealogy... except with all the branches, they're all people of... questionable origin.

Class: *general laughter*

Grier: You should like, keep a blog of the funny things that happen

Class: SHE DOES

Hanna: Haven't you seen her exam video?

Mr. H: You took a video of your exam?

And later...

Mr. H: *draws something related to probability*

Me: OOH, it's two balls in a jar!

*awkward moment*

Mr. H: We've got marbles in a jar... don't lose yours!

Love always,
Clara

I am both famous and clever

Witness my fame and cleverness.

I DID THAT.

Considering this person is kind of my role model (along with Elle Woods and Phillip Zimbardo), I'm loving life right now.

Love always,
Clara

In the Crossroads

John just highlighted Teddy's face. In pink.

Now we're talking about some kid with small hands and the irony of that. Apparently there's irony.

And John is coloring and Teddy is texting and showing me his magnetic pockets and singing about drugs and Stephanie is doing homework.

As for me? I'm blogging.

Love always,
Clara

Today was weird.

Weird weird weird.

That's all I can really say.

And I have so much work I might short circuit. 

"Circuit" is a really hard word to spell.

Or maybe I'm just retarded.

Conversation of the day:

Person: *is weird*

Me: Where did you come from?

Person: Where I always come from... your dreams!

This cracked me up.

Love always,

Clara

this week is insane

Thus, I might be a little bit out of it.

But here's a conversation I had today:

Me (walking away): Have fun doing whatever you do all day

Jonathan: Have fun being jealous of whatever I do all day

Last night there was an insane facebook photo-tagging-fest, in a tremendously inappropriate and offensive way. 

But remember that thing about never getting offended? Yep, it was at it again. So that's all good I suppose.

In Breakfast Club this morning, we performed an exorcism and talked about gossip girl. It was less legit than usual.

Love always,
Clara

My family is so weird

So I go downstairs for an apple.

And I walk toward the living room. I overhear my dad and my sister talking but I figure they're upstairs (my sister's room is right above the living room).

Then I enter the dark living room and realize the voices are coming from THE LIVING ROOM. and I hear my dad say "weird".

So I turn on the light and say "Speaking of weird, what are you guys doing?"

And my sister says "Talking about LSD"

To think I expected some kind of rational explanation. No such luck.

Of course, I had to join in and regale them with my extensive knowledge of LSD, heroin, eating disorders, and secret hatred of Virgos. I don't know how that one came up... but the conversation wandered.

Love always,
Clara

P.S. No offense if you're a Virgo. Really. It's nothing personal. I swear. It's just the stars. I wouldn't like you in person.

P.P.S. Oh but if I know you in person.... well, this is awkward.

P.P.P.S. I'm just digging a ditch for myself, aren't I? WHOEVER YOU ARE, I LIKE YOU. But if you are a Virgo, we probably aren't best friends. But I swear, I LIKE EVERYBODY.

Today, everything was funny

And I cannot remember why.

This is what happens when my allergies show up. I'll have a headache soon. I should address that before it happens.

But when I get my allergies, a number of things happen. That number is 5.

• Everything is funny
  
• I say stupid things
  
• I can't hear, so I talk really loud
  
• I get stressed out into a giggling frenzy
  
• I get a headache
  

I really should deal with it.

But to be perfectly honest, things are way more fun this way. Until I get that headache. Which doesn't always come. But I can feel my sinuses stuffing themselves anyway, so I know I'm not just like this.

Love always,
Clara

Bafflement

I would be more hesitant to post this on the blog, because it probably involves some kind of sensitive information, but a) it's on facebook anyway and b) if even I can't figure some of it out, and I know what these names mean, I think it's safe.

Just witness the amazingness of Daphna's codes though:

"middle names irish-ish equivalent is now in the state that a certain piece of meat was with with certain flower/bird as of last last month that middle name has a birthday in. with this person- flower bird met him, vaguely i think? sorry for how vague that was but if it was clearer people would easily determine their code names. anyway, idk about mind changing- jeanette seemed pissed too. parents are being increasingly annoying, about that and collegeness and stupidity and idiocy but they don't know its kind of an idiocy they just think certain people are being weird, because it's really not idiocy, it's just an effect of old idiocy that was never really resolved. i like to avoid implosions, unless there is reason. ooh do update me on idiot sluts. sounds like you may be confused? ooh, a semi-thing? intriguing. miss you ♥"

Tell me your head is spinning too. I love this girl.

Love always,
Clara

On the phone

"Slicing and carving and spreading cheese on bread is much harder than I thought it would be"

-wise words from vivian

Love always,
Clara

Why I Love Stephen Pinker

Who? Oh, google him, you shameless non-dork.

from an article in the New York Times Magazine:

"Still, I figured that my current burden of existential dread was just about right, so I followed Watson's lead and asked for a line-item veto of my APOE gene information"

Love always,
Clara

Too funny

"They are like my friends. Some people get kicks out of looking at bottles of wine, or... girls' bottom; I like like looking at type"

Watching Helvetica. It's really cool (if you like movies about typefaces)

Love always,
Clara

I need to write this down...

... mostly so that I can stop telling random people about it (which is my method of remembering things).

I had a dream the other night. I was at this place in a HUGE room with dark wood walls, like a cabin. And I was with this girl, her name was like "Carilee" or "Candie" or something, and we were roommates? And subsequently we were best friends, although I was unsure of the whole thing.

So there was like, a carnival sort of in the big room, and a line for best friend ice cream or something. You had to stand in a really long line, and then you and your best friend signed your names and they gave you ice cream.

Candie, being a bad influence, decided we didn't have to stand in line, and no one would know.

So we did.

Then we were walking around with the ice cream and in the line I saw a number of sophomores including Tom and I think Phillip. So we started talking to them, kind of bragging about how we didn't have to stand in line for ice cream.

Then this fat authoritative woman asked whether we'd waited in line for our ice cream. We said yes. I had a camera in my bag. She wanted to see pictures of us in line. I didn't have any. WE WERE DISCOVERED.

Then she made us stand in line (and NOT get any ice cream).

That was my dream.

Love always,
Clara

Moving up the grades...

Earlier this week I was hating on freshmen.

Then I felt bad about it, because the ones I actually know are pretty nice (although still prepubescent self-absorbed wannabe hot shit).

Today, I'm telling a story about a sophomore.

Or rather, as I tend to do, relating a real conversation. Said sophomore will be referred to as "MD".

MD: Hey Clara! *awkwardly puts arm around me, as I was in the middle of a conversation with Sam*

Me: Um hey...

MD: What's up?

Me: MD, how many conversations have we had?

MD: Well we've had numerous encounters... and maybe one conversation? I think this is our second conversation.

Me: I suppose this qualifies.

MD: So clara, I was wondering... After two whole conversations, do you think we're at the stage in our relationship where we can start having causal sex?

Me: ... um... not quite.

MAD AWK.

But the kid is funny.

I have this problem where I find things funny when I should be finding them terribly offensive. Darn.

The best part of this whole exchange though was that after he walked away, Sam, whom I had been talking to, says, 

"Clara, I've had hundreds of conversations with you at this point"

Too funny.

Love always,
Clara

Found something amazing

Okay, first I read about it in Wired, because I'm a loser like that.

Then I googled it.

And the four-hour workweek lifestyle sounds amazing.

Note to self: when you are out of school and on your own, look this up again.

People! Realize that you do not have to do as much work as you're doing, and still live a productive meaningful life! Please!

Love always,
Clara

PATRICK'S BACK

On my own laptop. Yessss.

(Patrick is the laptop. After Patrick Star, of Spongebob Squarepants fame. Because he's my best friend, but kind of an idiot at times)

It's weird because I have to reset everything... they gave me a new hard drive, but saved some files. All the important ones. All my ramblings, the novels, the videos, one great bit of footage I've been saving from freshman year... it's myself, Kayla, Katie, and Will, being freshmen and really quite silly. I want to save it until at least senior year, when I'll bring it out and shock them with their own youth!

That's my plan.

But anyway, I have to set my Safari bookmarks and whatnot.

And I just realized my playlists didn't carry over. Which is just a little troublesome. And the way I arrange everything by "date added" will no longer work. I'll have to start anew.

Alas.

Then there's the fact that I have to devote 40 minutes to part of a practice AP chem exam... and I'm not exactly looking forward to it

Love always,
Clara

Funny moments of Latin Class

Mama Latin on Love:

"Maybe it's because I read too much Fitzgerald. I'm like, "oh the love! oh the disillusionment!"

Apollo on Daphne:

"I'm a friend! I like your forearms!"

Papa Latin on early Romans' ignorance of lion's hunting patterns:

"Ovid didn't have the discovery channel..."

Now I'm in history, doing a project.

Or not...

Next time I post, I'll be back on MY COMPUTER! Yayyyy!

Love always,
Clara

A quote

If you can keep your head while those around you are losing theirs, you may have misjudged the situation -- Murphy's New Military Law

This defines my exam week experiences.

Love always,
Clara

Blogging from necessity

I *actually* don't think I have anything to say today.

Um... what even happened today?

Mr C was late for latin, so we played a short game of hangman. 

NOTE TO WORLD: a really great word to use in hangman is "lynx"

English was english. Hester Prynne is really growing on me. She is quite awesome.

Then we had assembly, in which we listened to some pretty great mistakes, watched Mr. Bean, and had a town hall meeting, in which I totally shut down Will, which made people ooh and ahh. Apparently people assumed it was due to the fact that we have like, post-relationship tension? I disagree. He was just wrong*

Then we had physics. Cool. I don't remember what happened. Seriously.

Lunch. Chorus.

Mr R is freaking out. We have a concert on sunday and we are a million shades of unprepared. Yikes.

Then History, in which a number of funny things happened.

Riley: In document G...

Cat: Isn't that a movie?

Riley: What?

Cat: Mr. Mcgee?

Riley: Document G?

Cat: What?

Among other things. Reading over that, it doesn't sound that funny. Maybe you had to be there.

And then math happened, in which we learned things that we've known since at least third grade. But they say it gets harder, so I'm being patient.

Of course, musical rehearsal was when the day actually began. Seriously. It gives me a reason to go to school. It was fantastic, as always, and we planned something, but I cannot say what, for fear that someone might read this blog, think our plan is amazing, and perhaps mention said plan to someone who must not know the plan.

It is all very unlikely, but I like the suspense. I shall reveal the thing tomorrow.

And we sang and whatnot and it was just lovely, and then I took the late bus home. My parents had a premonition that it would be icy today, so they didn't want me driving. 

Do premonitions have to be right? Or rather, does something have to be true for the earlier notion to be a premonition?

Because it wasn't icy at all.

Love always,
Clara

*Actually. And for those of you reading too much into all of this... don't. There's nothing to analyze here except the fact that exam week really ought to be four days long, because you have more free time to study/dick around, which is what I really love. If you know me well enough to be overanalyzing, you know how much I adore exam-related free time.

Freshmen

I'm stalking freshmen on facebook, because they don't have dignity.

Which makes them inclined to say all the stupid things they say over video chat as opposed to wall post where all is righted with  carefully placed 'lol'

Can I please quote?

"My hair looks so messy right now. It kind of looks like I just had SEX. I didn't, so don't worry"

"Um, I'm having some personal issues. I mean, not with myself, with other people, but it's still pretty personal"

"Today my outfit was sub-par, but tomorrow will be exciting, so... be prepared"

"seriously I'm never going to eat a skittle again. that's not true."

"I really like your perfume. I kind of want to eat it"

"Please don't end our marriage. Please!"

"My mouth hurts really bad. I hate braces really badly" <-- HAHA YOU HAVE BRACES BECAUSE YOU'RE A FRESHMAN AND THEREFORE AN AWKWARD CHILD

Maybe I'm being a judgmental hypocrite. I should listen to myself talk more often, to get perspective.

But sometimes I just want to lay the smack down on SOMEONE.

Mr P. says sometimes you just have to go home and kick your dog. I would never kick Chili. 

But I can verbally abuse some freshmen behind their backs... Thats fine.

Love always,
Clara

Therefore, some Serfs are Phat...

...and other moments at school.

Hanna: *coughs*

Mr. H: Does someone need to use the restroom?

Hanna: ... coughing doesn't usually constitute... having to... what?

Drew was the only guy in our physics class today, and Mr. C had an announcement about a girls-in-science summer program. then...

Mr C: Now I will teach some physical properties that apply only to females. Drew, please leave.

Shivani: CAN WE DO THAT TO SAM SOMEDAY?

And later...

Mr C: I have a question for you

Hanna: Oh, I did too...

Mr C: Mine is a physics question

Hanna: ... mine was a weather question...

Mr C: Its raining.

And I don't remember who said this, but it's written down in my margin...

"Mr C, let's start a revolution"

We learned torque today. Which makes the above comment brilliant.

And this is what I did in Physics today... The numbers are how many minutes left in class

The funny thing is that I knew exactly what was going on the whole time. I just like doing things with my hands.

Love always,

Clara

Redecorating and the Millennials

I was reading a PBTeen catalogue (it came in the mail. I was bored) and suddenly became... inspired. I realized that the thing that would make me happy and satisfied was white bedding and throw pillows.

It worked. I am now happy and satisfied. And I just kind of found the bedding/pillows around my house. Fifteen minute, totally free room makeover.

And yes, the doll with the penis ears stays. For those who know what I'm referencing. Although I guess you can draw your own conclusions.

I am a firm believer that if your surroundings are peaceful and calm, you yourself will be peaceful and calm too. My bookshelf is always messy though... I guess it's like my mind.

Yesterday I was rambling to Kayla about how I would so like, for just one day, for all the stupid thoughts bouncing around in my head all at once to just shut up. And then this other kid walks up and says "Clara, you're schizophrenic".

I said I was deeply offended.

I'm not really offended by anything. It's funny, actually. I think it's a combination of my first-child awesome self esteem and the general fact that my parents convinced me from an early age that I was the greatest thing alive. So if someone does offend me, I generally brush it off because either

a) they've got their priorities backwards

b) they have no idea what they're talking about, because they don't really know me.

They call us the "me" generation and say we expect everything. They seem to think we want instant gratification and we're super tech-savvy. Yes, yes, and yes.

They seem to think this is a problem.

Yeah, there are some whiny brats in my generation. Those girls you see on True Life who just complain to their parents all the time. They suck. It's true. 

But I think at the same time, our expectations make us one of the most motivated generations. My mom's generation had to fight for everything, I guess because there were so many of them, and the parents were largely disengaged (whereas we get those handy helicopter parents. Myself less so, but I know some people). Point is, they were used to hardship.

We expect a lot. And in my experience, if something isn't right I get frustrated. It should be right.

So maybe what I'm getting at is that we're less complacent?

And therefore more likely to change the world.

Because look who's getting involved? US. Not Gen X. The Boomers are done. We're the ones getting fired up, ready to go.

Although ironically I think the 'Fired up' line came from an old woman.

Oh whatever, she probably should have been born in 1991.

This blog post has been very tangential, but surprisingly for me, each one touched the circle.

It all connects I swear.

Although I really just wanted to talk about my bedspread.

Love always,
Clara

Yet again...

Here I am, sitting at school, on a bench, this same goddamn bench.

I'm so tired I could pass out. 

I'm like, mumbling and slurring my words.

That's a problem.

Nick is over here shaking up a disgusting protein beverage. 

Grosssss.

I love conference period. It means nothing. It is great. I want to sleep right now. I am basically incoherent.

Nick: I wouldn't read your blog because I don't read blogs. I'm sure your life is very interesting though, clara.

Me: *sounding exhausted and therefore like an idiot* YEAHHHHH

Love always,
Clara

LOL

My dad just revealed that he basically lived a life of nepotism.

There was one job his parents didn't help him get. And it was working at a mostly gay personnel agency on capitol hill. And it lasted a summer. In college. Apparently a guy had been hitting on him for like, six weeks (while he was dating his soon-to-be-wife [no, the other one]) and he DIDN'T NOTICE.

My dad is kind of dim sometimes.

But besides that, every job he ever had was arranged by his parents. Until he went into politics, in which case I suppose his parents still had a tiny say in the matter. 

He also worked for the boy scouts, which I find hilariously ironic for a large number of reasons. Of course.

Love always,
Clara

Real conversation of October 6, 2007

Me: lol under what circumstances would appetizers and dildos be served at a fundraiser?

Viv: ummm...i dunno maybe if there were lonely middle age women there? like the kind of women who hire jigalos but wanna keep it on the dl

Me: hahahahahaha of course. actually there are a lot of those at these fundraisers. but i don't think we give them dildos. we do give them appetizers.

Viv: well...i still think they could use some dildos. seriously.

Me: they probably could, but they probably would buy them on their own time, time that isn't affiliated with a political candidate.

I'm reading through my wall-to-wall with Vivian.

We are really funny people.

Love always,
Clara

My feet are cold

Like, literally. My toes feel as if they've been refrigerated. 

But on a completely unrelated note, I just watched gossip girl and loved it. Dan and Serena are back together, Chuck really truly is in love with Blair, and Rufus and Lily are off to find the baby. Yay!

What's weird about keeping a blog is that everyone knows what's going on in your life. I came home today having basically forgotten everything before 2PM. So I was telling mom, "I don't remember today" and Grace shouts down the stairs "I KNOW WHAT YOU WERE DOING! A BLOCK WAS CANCELLED AND YOU WANDERED AROUND DOING NOTHING"

It was kind of peculiar.

Funny thing of the day.

Lily: *rambles*

Lily: I'm like stand up comedy, but stand up not-funny

Claire: You're not even standing up, you're like, hunched over

Lily: Hunched over not funny?

I was feeling that way too. Living on caffeine, having crazy moments when it wears off.

Love always,
Clara

At school. Again.

And I have A Block free because Mr. C's son has an opthemologist appointment or something. I found that out too late, after spending a few minutes sitting outside the classroom with Katie, wondering where everyone else was hiding.

I do not know what to do with myself. Everyone is working. I don't have work. I don't see where they got this work. They're all like, studying and reviewing and all kinds of other crazy unnecessary things

Note to self: find some less-studious friends.

This should not be interpreted to mean "stupid" friends, because if I have learned one thing about myself it is that I find it hard to enjoy the company of stupid people. But befriending some people who take a break every once in a while sounds right up my alley.

What I said last night about potential changes in people... completely disappointing so far. Alas. I hate the fact that change takes so much time.

CHANGE NOW, PEOPLE! I DON'T HAVE ALL DAY!

I really don't know what to do with myself.

Love always,
Clara

Real Conversations on the phone

Me: *talking*... so explain that.

Isabella: Penguins?

Me: What?

Isabella tells me a story...

Isabella: They took over the boat and sailed it to antartica and so I had to swim back to shore...

Isabella: What a stupid name. Who names their kid legit stairwell?"

Me: I dunno. People who really like architecture?"

Love always,
Clara

Home!

Finally.

Saw my puppy, ate some yummy soup, had a jolly time.

Tried to use my old (like, 7th/8th grade) laptop in the place of patrick, the happy nonfunctioning macbook who might need his operating system reinstalled for reasons I cannot discern. Discovered it is also nonfunctioning. Died inside.

Mom gave me her laptop to use though, and said she's bring mine to the apple store tomorrow.

I love my family.

And weirdly, I'm so glad to be out of the "I want it and therefore it is mine" world of the Ritz penthouse. Yeah, it's pretty awesome, but it's also kind of uncomfortable, you know? I kept wanting to like, help out and be self sufficient and the like, but then I kind of felt like it wasn't my place, you know?

So I'm glad to be back where I can do things for myself without feeling way weird about it.

One downside to being home:

I have to go to school tomorrow. Shoot me please?

It might be kind of interesting though. See how two weeks changes people. 

Okay, wishful thinking. Winter break is a nonlinear discontinuity or something else I learned in algebra II last year, a random anomaly after which things continue as usual.

Summer's kind of like that too, but on the scale of summer, 'continue as usual' involves a lot of change regardless. its just more noticeable.

I'm still looking forward to the little changes that may or may not have taken place in certain people.

Hoping.

Love always,
Clara

OKAY.

Victoria's myspace escapades have inspired me.
No, I'm not going to become a crazy slut. Sorry. I know you were excited.
No, I've just realized that there ARE random people on the internet, and they ARE bored. And therefore, they have the time/interest to visit this blog.
Okay, maybe not the people that Vic is talking to. It's not that kind of blog.
But that's new year's resolution number 4. Increase the number of people who read this thing.
Maybe I'll start here.
I need a business card. Or a sticker. I've been talking about a sticker for months now. And it's a pretty freaking cool sticker too.
Maybe I need a point. Maybe people won't be inherently interested in my life.
Well why not?
Because it's not that interesting unless you're living it?
I find that hard to believe. I find my life very interesting, yes, but I also find random other people's lives very interesting, even people I don't know. So... That's not it.

Whatever. I'm determined now. I have made no effort whatsoever, but I've got determination damnit, and I'll get what I want!

I cannot take myself seriously. My apologies.

Love always,
Clara

Still in beaver creek

But now that we have a plan, or two actually, and everything's settled, I have a far more mellow attitude about it.
I was freaking out last night and really wasted my time doing that. Should have just gone to sleep.
Now Victoria's getting twitter. Yay!

ok later

Love always,
Clara

My thoughts right now

1) A minute ago I had the song "Light my Candle" from rent stuck in my head. Then (AFTER the song had been stuck in my head) Victoria started lighting candles. WEIRD.
2) Shane (a.k.a. brilliant amazing assistant man) isn't in his room. Meaning he's still downstairs with Victoria's mom and they're still working on it. Which is great because that means they're determined. But it teases me with the notion of going down there myself and helping. Not that I would have anything to contribute. Maybe it's just that I'd be willing to do things a little less 'comfortably' than they're used to.
3) I'm really tired, and Victoria is still hitting on myspace guys. I guess that's what she does for fun
4) We are staying another day here, but I've returned my skis and stuff and our passes are expired, so idk exactly what we're going to do except live out of suitcases and maybe eat room service.
5) It's kind of alarming how someone can be such a slut on myspace.
6) I feel the intense desire to be a total dork so as to calm myself down, so I've been on gizmodo.com. However, it's not helping as much as I would like
7) I had homework I was going to do, and I had to drop off my laptop at the apple place so that maybe, just maybe, I would have it for school on monday. That is not happening. And the thought of going to school without my laptop makes me want to die.
Why am I so obsessed with that thing?
8) Victoria just said "you're typing a lot". I guess I am, seeing as I'm having a lot of thoughts.
9) I'm tremendously frustrated by this whole situation. I want to call up the god damn weather gods and tell them they're really not working out for me.

Love always,
Clara

Stranded in a Ritz Penthouse

Apparently the weather gods have decided to give it to me hard.
But it's like, weather god rape. Completely non-consensual.
A snowstorm is coming to the midwest. Meaning my flight home is canceled. And we're staying another day? I guess that's the plan.
Victoria's hitting on people on myspace. I have an uncontrollable urge to go down with her mom and Shane and go into super-organization mode.
Although if there are two people in the STATE who can be super-organized like that, it's them.
I want to helppp.
I hate situations I can't control. And I can't stay here another day. Don't get me wrong, I'm having a great time, but there were a million and a half things I had to do between getting home and going to school. I'll have about two hours to do that now.
I'm freaking out. I should stop. But I can't help it.

Hold on, real conversation
Me: You think your mom and shane are still downstairs doing it?
Victoria: DOING IT?

Oh, she makes me sane.
But the sanity is fleeting. I'm still over here wanting to hitchhike to denver and catch a red-eye.
What bothers me is that my mom always anticipates this, and has us leave randomly in the middle of the night to escape the snowstorm, and we always think she's crazy, but I wish she'd been here this time because then I would have gotten home.
No offense.

Love always,
Clara

resolutions

I have some new favorite websites.

Oh, and NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS 2009:
1) start actually legit following my stupid health diet. Which will be easier now that I've learned I'm totally allowed and encouraged to eat eggs.
2) Become more confident. Easier said than done. whatever.
3) stop procrastinating. Really.

Love always,
Clara

Quotations...

"2008 was, well … it was amazing, exhausting, transformative, exciting, terrifying, emotional and … how the hell was it just one year?"
Sarah Lacey, via Julia Allison

Love always,
Clara

If today is any indication...

2009 is going to be hilarious.

Riley: I have that 'apple bottom jeans' song stuck in my head
Me: I don't get songs like that stuck in my head. I get like, melodic ones.
Victoria: I haven't had a song stuck in my head in a while. I don't really.
Me: Sometimes I get a song stuck in my head so loud I can't hear people talk.
Riley: I'm sorry, Apple bottom what?
Shane: I'm sorry, want your bottom what?

later, at dinner...
Me: *stares into space, inadvertantly in the direction of riley*
Riley: are you staring at me?
Me: Oh... Um...... actually, I was contemplating the typeface on that sign...

Love always,
Clara

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Yayyyy!
I hope your new year's eve happenings were as entertaining as mine.
Don't expect any powerblogging from me in the near future. My computer is throwing a hissyfit and I'm going to have to take it to the apple place once I get back in town.
I do not want to wait.
I do not want to use this computer that I am currently using, because the keyboard is really quite annoying.

These people around me are so hungover it's hilarious.

Love always,
Clara